Tag Archives: sleep

Sleep please.

This is what my brain looks like right now...

Let me tell you all about last night.

First though, let me just say I am in an exhaustion coma. M-f’er am I ever tired. So is Edward. Vince is totally passed out. Which is really not that surprising.

Late last night, we awoke to the sounds of terrified wailing. Which quickly turned into shrieking. And then turned into sobbing. By the time the sobbing was going on, both of us were sufficiently awake to actually move and respond.

I got up and opened his door.

“Muuuuummmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyy….. I wanna stay with you, in your bed. I wanna go Mummy, let’s go.”

We calmly and orderly proceeded to the big bed. Whereupon Vince closed the door himself and climbed up into the bed and settled down right into my spot. And refused to move. Even a little bit. And then he told me to go sleep in his bed.

Guess what? I did. I was so tired. And about 2 minutes into that, he started shrieking for me. Despite Daddy being right next to him. And so I was lured back to bed. I went as docile as a lamb. I think it was about 2:30 am at this time. I was slowly turning into a zombie.

Finally, with the addition of Vince’s own pillow and a sippy cup of water, he settled down.

“Mummy, Mummy, Mummy, Mum, Mum, Mummy.”

“Yes?”

“When it rains we use an umbrella so we can get the rain off.”

“Yes baby, that’s right.”

(Oh please kill me now)

“Mum, Mummy, Mummy, Mummy, Mum, Mum, Mummy.”

“Yes love?”

“We do a poo and pee in the potty and not in out pants.”

“That’s right baby.”

“Mummy, Mummy, Mum, Mum, Mummy, Mummy, Mummy.”

“Yes?”

“Halloween’s coming and I’m going to be a dragon.”

“Oh.”

Edward did not respond to any of this, mostly likely because he was not being addressed. I heard him snoring at one point and thought “You lucky, lucky bastard”.

Bastard.

And then somehow we were sleeping. And when I woke up next, it was morning and Vince’s feet were in my face.

Somehow the day progressed and is now over. Edward and I are on the couch watching ‘Attack the Block” and I’ve now been told to go to bed.

Mmmmmmmm, tired blog tonight….

xoxo a.m.

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The Game Plan

After about a month of the big boy bed, a month of crying and a month of feeling very emotional, we are revising the bedtime plan.

Not that we planned this or anything, it was just something that I did last night that worked so well I couldn’t even believe it. So I did it again this evening and it worked even better.

Essentially I have given in to the extremely sad cries that were leaking through his bedroom door and into the hallway over to where I stand every night. I have also given in to the clicking of the door knob as he tries to open his bedroom door and find Mummy. Always Mummy, only Mummy all the time.

There I am, every night, in the corner biting my lip. Listening to those noises and saying to myself (in my head) that this will all pass, it will all get better, V will stop fighting and eventually just go to bed. But unfortunately, things have remained the same. I mean, they certainly haven’t gotten worse, but it is not like they have been improving either.

It’s giving in, but in such a nice way.

“Mummy too?”, he says, patting his little pillow.

“Yes, Mummy too”, I respond, climbing onto his little twin bed and sharing that football and soccer ball covered pillow. He hands me his favorite blanket, which I tuck around him and then I lie down with him.

We listen to lullabys.

I watch his face, those eyes flickering here and there around the room. Sometimes they land on me and he smiles…

Eventually they close and I stay there for a little while longer.

I haven’t watched him fall asleep since he was a little, itty bitty baby. So while I watch him do that, it makes me think about him 2 years ago, so little and so hungry. And now, a monsterously huge little boy who eats like a beast, plays so hard you’d think it was an Olympic sport and sleeps like a brick. When you can convince him to fall asleep, I mean.

So I convince him by saying “Mummy too”, lying down next to him, stroking his back… and at the same time, I am having the time of my freakin’ life!! An actual cuddle with my boo, one he isn’t even fighting!! Bliss!! Utter bliss!

And really, when you really think about it? Why would I ever be in any hurry to leave? What do I have to do that is so darn important that I can’t sit with my child and comfort him while he tries to fall asleep?

Not a damn thing. Best idea I have ever had in years. YEARS!

So for the last two nights, I have not bitten my lip or hovered in any hallways. OR tried to hold back tears OR felt at all guilty at all.

So far, it sounds like this is a total win.

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