As life centers around the bowl these days, it’s only fair to share with everyone. I am sure Vince will appreciate it when he is older. Or when he can read.
This week has been a week of underwear. As in, Vince is going to and from school in underwear! Wow! Huzzah! Someone can pee in the potty all by themselYes!
Not that this means there are no accidents. As there seem to be many and they are all gross and are all situated around me, post-work and usually when Edward is otherwise occupied. With his ipad. Bastard.
Last week, when we were doing a ‘dry-run’, success was in the works until we hit what I would call a road block, but perhaps other people would call ‘a shower of poo’.
As in, he told me he had to poo. He poo’d. We could ONLY go upstairs to sort out this mess, and with every step he took, there was a shower ‘nuggets. and this was something I didn’t notice right away.
Vince pointed it out for me. “Mummy. Ders poo. Right der.”
“Yes. Der is.” “Where?” “Mummy!!!! Poo right der!” (The floors are dark wood)
“Where honey?” “MUMMY! Right der!!!!!”
And lo and behold, there was. All over my livingroom floor. On the landing. And up the stairs.
“EDWARD!!!!!!! I need you to clean up poo!!!!”
Ok, so anyways, that was awful. And then it didn’t happen again until Tuesday.
“Mummy! I poo!”
Oh god. And he did. In his underwear. And then was so frantic to have his pants changed of it, that the poo splatted on the floor of the bathroom and down his leg. Wonderful.
“Hun!! Is there a problem?”, Eddie shouted from the living room.
And then, I literally super ray-gun laser-visioned through the wall and burned his face off.
And then it happened again. But this time, since I had seen a pattern, I thought I had an answer. Get someone on the potty asap. Because apparently, they do not poop at school, they save it for home and then *attack* poop the house.
So I went in attack mode. I tried to be preventative. Instead, I just caused an international incident.
*A soft whisper from E later: “I think you might have been a bit over-reactive”*
*Whisper back:”Like a nuclear reactor”*
And now I feel awful, hoping that I did not scar him for life. I think we are having poop issues. Boo!
a.m. (please pray for me)