Where I am a pain in my own ass and other ridiculousness

Mmmhmm, it’s Saturday night and hey guess what! I over-did it today! Probably I should get a high-five for that?

"I am very serious about my tools"

Even though I am 31.5 weeks pregnant, my brain seriously seems to shut down and think that I am not pregnant at all. And so I proceed with my Saturday like I normally would. So told it was Home Depot with friends for the free children’s workshop, then off for donuts, then over to BabysRus to register, then to Waterford Lakes to Barnes & Noble for a quick book look, then to the movies to see Alvin and the Chipmunks 3, back home to Lake Nona to hit the grocery store and finally home to make dinner, bathe the munchkin, do 2 loads of laundry and put Vince to bed.

Regular Saturday stuff. Usually this kind of thing is de rigueur for me. Edward working 7 days a week and the fact that he’s in the middle of a ‘marking papers’ marathon necessitates me keeping Vince busy and out of his hair.

But seriously, I’m a total dumbass. I was so worn out from life, work, toddlers etc that I could barely function on Friday at work and had to go home and sleep. I can’t walk fast anymore. I am in full on waddle mode. What the hell am I thinking?

Gah, I’m a pain in my own ass.

And the seriously funny thing is that I honestly was planning on doing crafts with Vince once I got home. So much so that I was actually shaving crayons in the kitchen while he was eating dinner in prep for some crafty business.

This is what we are planning on doing tomorrow. Thanks Martha Stewart! Crayon hearts are awesome, easy and will look lovely hanging in the window and maybe even Baby Girl’s bedroom? I’m mentally planning lots of Valentine’s day crafts with Vince this month.

Partially because we had the following ridiculous conversation about Valentine’s Day:

Me: “Valentine’s Day is a day where we tell our favorite people that we love them an extra lot and maybe we make them a special present too!”

V: “I like presents. I’m going to buy a present for ME! And it’s going to be GREEN! Like the pig from Angry Birds!”

M: “Hmm, well…”

V: “And then we are going to play Angry Birds. And then we are going to give Chewie an Angry Birds present! And Mummy, can I play the Angry Birds Seasons game on your phone? Now?”

M: “…..”

So clearly we need some more education regarding this made-up holiday. Which is what the month of January is going to be devoted to. And clearly I need to remove Angry Birds Seasons from my phone OR stop using it as a bribe while grocery shopping.

So tomorrows plans will be a little more laid-back than today’s. Because I am not a crazy person. And I still work full-time. And I need to make sure I squeeze a wee bit of rest into the day. I’m daydreaming about a pedicure right now…

I’m going to go and prop my belly up on a pillow in bed and watch something totally ridiculous on Hulu.

xoxo a.m.

Knitting regroup

So Saturday I went back to Michael’s and returned all of that yarn that I so lovingly described a few nights ago.

In my mind, as I plan my knitting creation, it gets more and more elaborate. I am trying so hard to remain realistic. I am a beginning knitter. I don’t ever use a gauge. I never knit a sample and never really monitor my tension. There, I confess.

I do, however, have high expectations. And grandiose ideas. And a lot of confidence. So when I found out that you could not felt acrylic yarn, I was devastated. All of that gorgeous yarn I bought? Yup. You guessed it. (acrylic, for those who didn’t)

And I hadn’t even planned on felting in the beginning. But a combo of a memory of one of my coworkers mentioning she was going to try making a felted purse, plus another coworker asking me about my knitting plans “Are you going to felt those squares?”, plus my mother telling my that my Auntie Nan made a lovely felted blanket for her first grandson (little felted squares crocheted together)… well…

So when I was asked “Are you going to felt the squares?”. Well, of course the answer was yes.

“Yes, that is exactly what I’ve been planning on doing”. Said with confidence. Even though I have never felted a thing in my life, except for those few times when I threw those wool sweaters in the dryer.

So Vince and I returned all that yarn and then I carefully went through the meager selection that Michaels had to offer, looking for wool, or at least a wool blend (with at least 50% wool). Ugh. Not much to offer there. But I was determined to bring home something. After all, it is cold in Florida now, being that its ‘Fall’ and all. I need something to keep my hands occupied while I huddle near the heater, desperately trying to stay warm.

Vince quietly destroyed a small display. I finally made a decision. Not a hundred percent happy with it, but it will do. It is a wool blend, a lovely variegated pattern of raspberry, fuchsia, purple, blueberry, marigold and various other shades of pink and purple. Rather pretty.

The majority of 100% wool the store carries were ‘wool’ colours. Browns, sheepy sorts of gray and cream. As much as I love those natural fibers, I am a bright colour type of girl. And I have this vision too, you see.

A lovely, vibrant afghan draping over the side of my red velvety couch. Contrasting nicely with my dark wood floors and creamy walls. A cocktail of colour in the corner of the living room. And something that I can look at with pride.

I;ve made 2 squares so far. and partially felted one. It is going to work. And it is going to look fabulous.

But I am going to need more yarn. I need some more colour. I need more woolies. And honestly, I am not even sure if that is something one can find in Orlando. All yarn shops either look like this well-known one in my hometown of Victoria, BC (Beehive) or as one of those yarn shop stories that everyone seems to be writing. In fact, it was reading one of those books that made me want to pick-up knitting needles again.

If anyone local knows a good place, please let me know.

Wish me luck with my little project. I am going to attempt to felt this weekend. Possibly I will post pictures. Possibly. 🙂

xoxo a.m.

Knitting. Again.

Knitting is entirely to blame for my lack of, well, anything social these days.

After last years crochet-fail, all crafty things were put aside. Plus, once it started to get hot down here I forgot all about indoor crafts and focused instead on swimming, running, walking etc.

However, it is now officially Fall.

And Florida knows that because the temperature has dropped about 4 degrees…

With the arrival of cooler weather, my thoughts have turned to the pursuits of Autumn and Winter. And crafts. And knitting.

I drove to Michael’s  on my lunch break one day and picked up some gorgeous yarn. All sorts of eggplant purples, marigolds, burnt oranges and raspberries. Lovely, glowy jewel-like colours. So beautiful, actually, that it was hard to wait until I got home to play them.

Lovely bamboo knitting needles to go with it all, which I have to admit make the most wonderful click-clacking noise. Which I think sound much nicer than metal needles.

Anyways, so all I am doing with my spare time is click-clacking away on the couch like an old lady. And then click-clacking away at work on my lunch break. It’s very soothing. I feel pleased to have something else to do with my hands in the cold, harsh Floridian Autumn.

In between cleaning up puke and poo, I mean. You know, because that is the other thing that is constantly waxing and waning in our household.

Right now it waxing. It’s been a very very long day. One that started very very early with a relatively healthy little boy. And then proceeded to regress as the day progressed. Not that he himself was out of sorts or in poor spirits. He just had a really upset stomach. Something I sadly didn’t know about until we were leaving the library this morning and walking out to the car, when I noticed that it smelled like poo.

I honestly thought it was sewage or something (which it was, in a manner of speaking). I remember thinking “God, it smells like shit out here. How gross for the library!”. And as we got into the car and began driving away, the smell got stronger.

How mysterious.

I didn’t make the connection at all, not until I noticed a discolouration on my arm.

Ewwwwwwwwwwww. I am just going to leave it at that. It was really too awful to want to remember. Plus, it was disgusting. Plus, really gross.

I had to buy him new clothes. I had to clean my arm. I had to go to my in-laws to clean up this whole mess (as we were out running errands when this all happened and nowhere near home)

Ugh.

And then we went home. And Vince and I watched Cars. And I knitted.

A soothing, healing way to end a day that became, well, crappy.

xoxo a.m.

Project

Who knew people crocheted skank clothes?

 

Last year I did a lot of crocheting… I made a wee baby blanket for my girlfriend, a wee one for myself (anticipating the arrival of the Little Man), a shawl to snuggle him in while I was breastfeeding. As winter approached, I decided that making a ‘big-boy’ was a wonderful idea too.

How nice for him to have something made by his Mummy to snug the face into at night and keep those toes warm during the harsh Floridian winters… I happily spent my lunch hours and evenings unraveling my many mistakes and raveling them back up…

Post-crochet explosion in our house (and post-pregnancy as well), that yarn that Little Man so helpfully chose for me (by putting it in his mouth) started to grow some bunnies. Dust bunnies, that is… I moved the project from its prominent position in the living-room and its travel bag for its work commute, to another bag in our bedroom. And then that bag was hung up in our closet. And then it started to get warm again and suddenly the whole purpose of the blanket was not so emergent anymore.

I had lots of time to work on it. And because I had lots of time to spend on it, I spent no time at all.

None.

That’s  the way it works, right?

And then we went to Canada.

And then we decided to buy a house.

And then we bought one.

And then we moved.

And now? We are settled. And to kick off this wonderful cool temperature that seems to be moving into the Central Florida area, I thought it would be nice for V to have a blanket to snug his face.

Apparently I only have so many ideas and they just rotate throughout the year… Sad.

Last night I couldn’t find my crochet bag. Slight panic. M managed to pull it out of somewhere. Hallelujah!

I pulled my little project out of its bag and was shocked.

SHOCKED!

It was teeny.

It might as well have been a place mat.

How was he ever that little?! Looking at it and then remembering him from this morning, imperiously shouting ‘Mumma!’ at me, while pointing at his bottle I had in my hands and then toddling off to watch Murray from Sesame Street talk about the ‘Word on the Street’.

Last night I spent the evening unraveling that loving creation, feeling a little weepy while I was doing it. It took about 45 minutes, but there was just no saving it. It was too small and no amount of frilly fringe would make it big enough to cover the man-child. And frilly fringe would just be a bad call. Really bad call…

So here we go again… Starting tomorrow, I mean. And yes, it will be chronicled. Expect updates.

It will be made this winter, damn it!!