Conversations with my Husband

Gosh, do I ever have the silliest conversations with M. So ridiculous that I might need to make it a weekly topic.

M: “Just got home from work and V is tearing the house apart. He keeps bringing me things I haven’t seen before. Most of them are your shoes.”

J: “Ha! Wait. What? Where is he getting these shoes from? I don’t have that many shoes.”

M: “Sure you don’t. Ahem. Anyways, he just came out carrying a pink stocking…”

J: “….??? What? That must be yours.”

M: “What? That doesn’t make any sense.”

J: “Well, I know those aren’t my stockings as I don’t have any pink ones, so they must be yours…hahaha… you own pink stockings!”

M: “Your Christmas stocking? You know, the one that’s pink fake fur? That’s what I mean by ‘stocking’.”

J: “Oh. I totally didn’t visualize a Christmas stocking, I was thinking about stocking stockings. Like panty-hose. You know?”

M: “….Way to date your self. Hahahahahahahaha… what are you, 90? No-one calls them stockings anymore!”

J: “What? Ha! TONS of people call them that.”

M: “Sure Mildred.”

J: “Hahahaha… don’t call me that!”

M: “Whatever you say, Gertrude.”

J: “I liked Mildred better.”

And it went on from there. Am I really the only one that calls them stockings? Am I from 1912? Do I have too many shoes?

Tune in next week for more ridiculousness…

xoxo a.m.

Coherency

I might be cool.

Naw…… we all know I’m not. These days I can barely talk about anything besides V with any coherency.It feels like I can’t even have a proper conversation with anyone without throwing in numerous details about darling child. AND, what is really awful, is that I expect you to be just as interested as if I were discussing world events. Or Michael Jackson. Or politics (as if I even can).

But, hit me up about making your own baby-food, breastfeeding, diaper brands, teething and what to feed a toddler (or almost toddler) and I can talk your ear off.

This might mean that I have become uninteresting.

So while I dwell on my lack of conversational skills these days….*sigh*…. I try to focus on what I could be talking about.

MJ’s funeral…. didn’t watch…. was appalled at family parade of small children and weeping in front of microphone (awful!!), which I saw on CNN and news flashes the next day.

That lady who left her kids in the car while she waited for her take-out pizza. I noticed as I got into my car before her, and saw her wee little one looking at me from the backseat. What is with that! She glanced at me as she got in with a carefully controlled look on her face. She knew what she did.

And I will be judging her forever. Isn’t that nice of me? Seriously, just bring your kid in with you…. for reals…

Just watched ‘Gran Torino’ and man, it was one hell of a movie. Clint Eastwood is an amazing director. Usually, I leave the room during most movies, or talk over the whole thing. I refrained *cough cough* partially from talking through it.

Teething is my enemy. V is a teething master, and by master I really mean I wish he would stop. Or the teeth would stop. But since there are many empty spaces left in that little mouth of his, I imagine that there will be  a lot of interesting nights to come.

I found a grape seed firmly lodged in his front teeth this evening. And it was a full-on war to wriggle it out. Followed by a huge tantrum. Which makes me think that he might be a little spoiled…. just a bit…

I have reconnected with some interesting people over the last few years. Mostly through facebook. Which I both curse for it’s addiction and embrace for its full-on ridiculousness… And then embrace again for the people that I reconnected with…

I sometimes fool myself into thinking that I take good nature photos. And sometimes I do. I would like a macrolense so I could experiment with some tighter construction, hopefully ending with some clearer shots.

I really need a pedicure.

See? It is all so self-focused… and mostly about babies and celebrity gossip. Oh, and me. *sigh*

I think I need some practice on having conversations.

With actual people. And not with the dog, V or Elmo…