Tag Archives: Catholic good times

Please stop asking for donuts (during the christening)

Getting all gussied up for church

Last night we landed in Orlando around 10:30. I was in bed by 11 pm. Such is the blessing of living near the airport. In bed, not unpacked, but in bed with a washed face and contact lenses out.

And up a few hours later for work which, in retrospect, possibly I should have just slept through, on my couch. I was mostly coherent. Another blessing.

And speaking of blessings, Vince was blessed by Father Stephen on Sunday with his cousin Chloe, truly a mostly well-behaved event.

It sounds like I said most well-behaved, right? It’s a lie.

Vince: “Mummy, I no like this place! I wanna go home. I no like it. I wanna go. I NO LIKE IT!! I WANNA GO!!”

…is what was chanted during the ceremony. And I would love for you to guess where we were sitting. Please do. Please. PLEASE.

Also: “Mummy, I WANNA DONUT!” and “Mummy! Where’s my firetruck!” and “Mummy, I dropped my firetruck!

And then, mostly just the following “Mummy! Mummy Mummy Mummy Mummy! MUMMY! Mummy Mummy!

It was a wee bit of a long ceremony, longer then I was anticipating. I can totally understand the whinging. Vince and Chloe were the oldest there, so it’s not that surprising that they were TOTALLY bored with everything.

Tricky thing, this christening. Tricky thing. The real tricky part is when the Priest asks you to lean them over the the font. But your child is, perhaps, three. So leaning is really out of the question.

It’s more like draping a stiff mannequin over a fountain… One that is silently screaming, that is. Who knew they could do that? While being politely draped over a baptismal font. Oh child of mine, you are so good at being dramatic..

It was a lovely, painful, extra dramatic, donut-wishing, fire-truck driving on bibles type of ceremony. A real special ceremony.


We survived. That is all.

xoxo a.m.

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Filed under epic, family, Mad skills, parenting

Wallet and watch

I am sure this is EXACTLY what V's baptism will look like... Right?

Thursday night this past week was a big, exciting evening for us. Not only was it almost the end of a rather exhausting week, but Edward and I attended baptism class at a local church.

By local church, what I really mean is splendid cathedral in the heart of downtown Orlando. We went to St James Cathedral, thinking (correctly as it turned out) that this would be the best place in the city to take a class like this.

Let me just say that I haven’t been to church in years. And the last time I did might have been a Christmas mass with my Mum and Granny. Edward hasn’t been in years either. But Vince attends a Christian based daycare and we feel it’s an important thing to do. Also, I am not Catholic. Edward is. As is his whole family.

So, this whole Catholic baptism? Well I was a little… nervous. I guess that is the best way to describe it. The Cathedral was enormous. We had no idea what we were doing. We parked somewhere that we were not sure if we should be parking. It was on church grounds, it looked like you could park there. Well, it didn’t specifically say ‘don’t park here’. So we parked. Hoping maybe that that homeless guy would guard our car…

We wandered in through the main entrance. There was nobody there. Peering in through the glass that separated us from the main church, someone gestured at us wildly. After a lot of “Who me? Or him? Us? You mean us?” gesturing, we walked down the aisle towards the front of the church and encountered a rather cheerful person, who asked us if we were here for the ‘adoration’.

“No, we are looking for the baptism class…”

“OH!! OK!! Just go…..” and she gave us very explicit directions which I believe we both promptly forgot after following just one part.

Because, as we followed her pointing finger through a door and into a courtyard, we encountered about 150 people. They looked tremendously cheerful too. One of them asked us if we were here for the ‘adoration’ too.

“Um, no. The baptism class.”

We were directed to a little old lady in a very secure room on the other side of the courtyard. She buzzed us through to a secure area and instructed us to take the elevator to the basement.

The basement was pitch black.

For about 10 seconds I serious thought I was in a horror movie. And then? I turned my head to the right and saw a room with some people and then thought “Great. We’re late.”

But, great! We weren’t!

In fact, it all went smoothly and the Deacon promised we would be done an hour earlier than the class was scheduled for. That was Deacon David. The nicest person ever. I honestly wanted him to be my neighbour/best friend/family member. He was one heck of a guy.

And so we learned. And prayed. And talked awkwardly about ourselves. And smelled Holy oils. And I learned a very interesting thing.

Even though Edward hasn’t been to church in five million years, he can still spot on cross himself at the beginning of a prayer just like he never stopped attending. I wish he’d warned me. I just felt confused while that was going on… and then kind of embarrassed.

And as we were leaving he yelled at me for stepping on the grass. And then apologized, stating it was just reflex. Made me laugh.

Made me love him more. Even though he is the hugest pain in my ass. I just might love him a bit more now….

xoxoxo a.m. (spectacles, testicles, wallet and watch)


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